Write Or Die

You know what I can't do? I can't write. I know, I know, this seems strange, what with me calling myself a writer, and with me taking a Writer's Craft course, it seems odd that the one thing I couldn't do is write. It's not that I'm bad at writing, I've been told I am in fact quite good at it, and the mark I got on my English summative last year seems to prove it. It's not that I'm low on ideas, I think of things to write about constantly. The only reason I can't write is, I simply can't put things down on paper, in a consistent manner.

Luckily, I think I know why this is; I am a perfectionist. Everything I write, I first go over in my head, to make sure that it is worthy of being put on the page. The problem is, nothing is ever good enough. I am unwilling to believe that what I write will end up sounding good, and will simply come out sounding forced, and awkward. I am a person driven by his inner critic, nay, his inner censor. This, my fellow patrons of the Internet, is why I cannot write.

However, I seem to have found a solution to my constant self-censorship, a wonderful web app, by the name of Write or Die. The basic concept of Write or Die is that you have to keep writing. No matter what. This is because, if you stop writing, for a variable amount of time, ranging from "forgiving", to "evil", this program antagonizes you into writing more. This can be accomplished in different ways, such as in lower difficulties, where it plays annoying noises, to the higher difficulties, in which it deletes your Feicking words, at a rate of one word per second. Truly, 'tis an instrument of the devil himself. However evil and horrid it may be, however, the fact remains that it shows results, as evidenced by the fact that I have written the previous 336 words in just under 13 minutes. This, for someone of my output ability, is a Feicking miracle. So, my friends, colleagues, and people whose existence I only tolerate, (You know who you are.) I urge you to, if you have similar problems with fixing word to page, try this horrible, demonic, wonderful, amazing, sinister tool.

I for one plan on using this handy little tool on all of my blog posts, and most, if not all of my school writing assignments. So, from now on, I will be posting the word count of the post, as well as the time it took to write, on Write or Die.

 For my third blog post this year, this is Kyle Whittle, signing off.


Link

Word count: 404
Time: 16:10